2017’s Sum

Years has always been all the same to me because simply the term of “year” was a mere expression for numbers that we use to keep track on time. But 2017! was unique and different.It was a mixture of lots of events, emotions, and breakdowns. Throughout this year my heart has been broken over and over again; losing both, my grandmother “lemmima” and my grandfather “Jedou”; being through all the shit people did to break me down and going through traumatic days in which I’ve almost lost my sanity. However, and through the course of this year I have learned how to move on and how to get on my feet, I met amazing souls and unforgettable hearts…

         So let’s get right into the things I have learned and The advice I am giving myself and y’all to keep and use in 2018… 

1: The world ain’t mad, but rather humans: If u think you know someone good enough to trust, well, reconsider that again. Everyone has a dark shade that You’ll never get to meet until that particular person makes u meet in the most horrible and unpredictable way. Take precautions. Protect Your heart… 

2: Briefly speaking; Musicians are fake, assholes. Basically, all artist are, including me, So don’t get impressed by them cause nothing is really what it seems to be. Appearances are deceptive. 

3: It’s amazingly disappointing how you can misjudge the most beautiful and magnificent souls that you literally get to meet once in your life. these souls are real keepers. Don’t lose them, Respect them and protect them. 

3: Karma is a bitch… Now I believe truly that what goes around comes around. Stop thinking that what you do today won’t affect you tomorrow.

4: close or not. People will keep on hurting, bullying, and be gossiping you just for their own fucking pleasure. It hurts. It devastates. How to defense? Do good to those who break you. nth will last in this doomed life and only #goodness and #kindness are the weapon and remedy u need to keep on living…

5: Miracles can Happen. and in the last months of this year, a miracle had happened to bright and rock my world; a miracle which I thought I lost. Cherish miracles for they happen once in life. 

6: Grandparents are irreplaceable. If yours are alive seek their prayers, love, and company; they can teach you all you need to know about Life.

7: last but Not least: Movies and Books are your Only friend Girl. Keep watching more and reading even more for the rest of your Life. 

hopefully, #2018 will be as simple as it can be.

I don’t expect anything.

I don’t need anything. 

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How I started

I started my journey toward learning art when I first had my heart-broken. It was then when I knew that the only reason I will be drawing, painting and even writing is when pain reaches its greatest and highest degree.

2015_2016 was the year Pain reached its highest degree and when I started investing time into learning how to draw because basically, I had nth to do rather than to draw. That year was the worst when I finished my secondary school studying and had my baccalaureate degree and after that, I simply didn’t start my Higher education at Uni and instead I stayed home heartbroken. It was literally the hardest, painful and traumatic experience I have ever faced and lived. Yet it was then when I created ART through Pain.

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So basically at First, my routine was like this: waking up late; coffee, lots of coffee; art and long dark nights and nothing more; my life was boring and sometimes it felt meaningless with no passion or goal and the hardest part was that time is passing and I am not accomplishing anything in my life. I had 18 years old: young and full of energy to do my best to create a better future of my own and fulfill my dreams and be the person I want to be.But that was out of my league because I wasn’t able or rather I wasn’t allowed to finish my education, however.

Life was hard and Art saved me because it was my only shelter from all the damage people made. I found salvation when drawing and from that, I kept hanging there till all the pain was transformed in a form of lines arranged in an artistic manner. It feels like magic how feelings control the way my drawing turn to be. It’s a process which I will never be able to explain or to determine until I hold that pen while my heart speaks to the paper unconsciously.

When my heart aches I run directly to my sketchbook and my pencils to complain and declare the pain as though they’re the remedy and cure… It was like this until one day  I met them…

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Zoom Club was the turning point in that particular time of my life; they were the reason I developed my skills even more and learned how to be more creative, for they given me the chance to share my art and They accepted me to be a part of them. And that was priceless. I will always be grateful for each and every one of them.

Initially, Zoomers are another story for another Blog <3.

They gave me hope, and that hope was all that I needed. So the formula was the following: pain+zoom=ART; It may sound unreal but it was literally it. I mixed all the tragedy in my heart with the hope and motivation Zoomers gave me to create the few pieces I made during that year, and honestly I never really admitted this to myself until I quit them. Because after that I never gave the best of me to art, When I left Zoom’s I left huge parts of me there and never did the same I did when I was with them…

these are the few pieces I made during the year 2015/2016 and each piece had it’s own Story that I will talk about in the following Blogs…

 

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IF I HAD TWO HEARTS…

 

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HANGING THERE…
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WILD HUMAN
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Storm of Motions
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THE PRISONER INSIDE ME